Break things.
Feel better.
Destruction Therapy is a revolutionary practice for achieving inner peace by destroying a bunch of shit. As you may know, it is not morally, socially, or legally acceptable to just pick up a sledge hammer and beat the living hell out of a person or their property just because you feel like it. The United States is still a nation of laws. (Kind of.)
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But at Destruction Therapy Center, you can step into a padded room and safely channel your anger into a spectacular, soul-cleansing whirlwind of destruction and mayhem.
Benefits of Destruction Therapy
01.
Lower Your Blood Pressure
Bottling up your anger is really unhealthy according to almost everyone. The cardiopulmonary system, the nervous system, and the brain are all connected, or something like that. But stress is a killer–that much we know.
02.
Keep Your Job
HR departments tend to frown on violent assault, particularly when heavy tools are involved. Taking a hammer to Josh from Accounting could get you suspended or even fired. But in the safe confines of our therapy rooms, you can pretend that plate or that printer is anyone you want. You can even bring their picture and tape it to your target if you want. Then you can go back to work and smile through those infuriating meetings without punching a single coworker.
03.
Avoid Prison
Allowing yourself to beat the shit out of glassware, housewares, and small electronics can reduce the urge to beat the shit of other human beings by as much as 93%. If you've ever seen Shawshank Redemption or American History X, you'll agree that $175 is a very small price to pay to minimize your odds of landing in the slammer.